No Longer Legal

No Longer Legal

On one particular “girl nights” this past summer I played one of those question games where you get to know people better. Things like, “If you were a unicorn what would you do?” or “If we were all in a fire who would be best equipped to handle the exit strategy?” All of these questions were really funny but the answers made them even funnier! This little game however led my husband and I to use one of the questions in a very different capacity.

As most of you know, we speak, write and encourage couples on relationship success, lifestyle, and high performance living.  One of the questions on that specific night loaned itself to some incredible insight.


“If you could make one legal thing no longer legal what would it be?” 

The answers on the night of that ladies trip were broad and humorous. What was interesting was that this particular question sat in my mind for a while. It kept coming back up for me but in totally different ways. It caused me to think further and more profoundly on the matter of what we choose to allow to dictate space and ideas as ok in our lives.

The thought that I kept coming back to was, what we allow to be “legal” in our lives that shouldn’t be. Things we absorb and the things we deem ok. These ideas and concepts that  for whatever reason we just take as fact and acceptable. They are not good, right, or beneficial in any way. Things  and phrases like “marriage is hard,” verbal assault under the blanket of “constructive feedback,” violence in any form, hate, malnutrition. All of these things are things we should deem “No Longer Legal.”

When I rattle off this list most of us would say we would love to have all of those things eradicated from our lives.  Yet, personally we malnourish ourselves all the time, we hate any and every single opinion that is different from our own, and we orally assault ourselves with negativity that we would never ever let anyone else say.

So I ask again, What legal thing should you make no longer legal in your life? Not in any way should you accept this, not from others or from your self. Choose to say enough.

Things like:

  • verbal assault
  • hate
  • negative venting
  • gossip
  • malnutrition
  • substance medicating
  • rudeness
  • judgement
  • unhealthy thoughts that don’t serve you
  • negative feedback
  • arrogance

None of these things are loving. And like Carrie Underwood says: “We believe that in the end love wins!”

Creating Exceptional standards for what we are going to allow in our lives will help us to live more fully! So what standards are you making for yourself and for your relationships?

Galatians 5: 22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
+++ If you enjoy these concepts and would like to have Steve and Kate as special guests on a podcast, blog, or to speak at an event near you go checkout An Exceptional Romance for further information on how to engage with these authors!

What are the Keys to a High Performance Marriage?

What are the Keys to a High Performance Marriage?

Last December, we had the unique opportunity to sit down with Ted Lowe from MarriePeople as we discussed a few concepts from our upcoming book.  This site provides amazing tools to couples of any age as it navigates today’s biggest topics while providing simple ways for couples to make marriag more real, fun, and simple.  We hope you’re encouraged, challenged, and inspired to create something exceptional.


LISTEN TO THE PODCAST – “What are the keys to a high performance marriage?”

(repost from the MarriedPeople podcast)

*Your one simple thing this week*

Pick one of the three characteristics of a high-performance marriage and work on it together.

  • Dream: Write down one goal that you want to accomplish in your marriage during the next 10 years.
  • Grow: Pray together so you can grow deeper as a couple.
  • Date: Do something you’ve never done before on a date night.




The Podcasts that Inspire and Can Change Your Life

The Podcasts that Inspire and Can Change Your Life

The is a list. Podcasts are all the rage right now. They are the new platform to get a message out. It is also one of the best ways to get inspiration and free therapy. Literally. I love podcasts because they are such a great resource. I listen to many different people and many diffrent ideas but they all have the same befit for me. They make me better. When you can feed your soul and be pumped by others (and for free!) you should do it!! This is none negotiable for those that want to create growth in life. The struggle here is wading through the fluff and finding the ones that really speak out to you. There are many recommendations – these are my personal favorites.

Here are my top podcasts and why:

Wire talk with Karen Stubbs – Birds on a Wire : this one is for all you moms out there. Inspiring and encouraging this podcasts gives you easy to implement thoughts on everything about mom life. Empowering on being the best version in this role.

Rise with Rachel Hollis : You want to be a super star? Listen. She is awesome. I relate a ton to her. I met my hubby at 19 as she met her’s. Her life long dream of writing – mine. Her lack of education but loads of street smart – check. She had a heart for foster kids too.

North Point Community Church : spiritual growth of the highest quality and yet practical and down to earth application. This is my church and I am passionate about how they run growing a relationship with Jesus

The Brendon Show : rock star status here you come!! A high performance coach and a Oprah recommendation he is a star to the stars. Fantastic business and life coaching.

The Life Coach School : Don’t have the money for a coach? Learn some tips on how to self coach! I use this format in my own coaching and have done training with this woman’s program.

Read Aloud Revival : The incredible benefits of hearing and not just silently reading. All the book recommendations you could want and how to have a culture of reading in your home.

For the Love with Jen Hatmaker : relevant and controversial topics discussed here. She is someone who stretched the thinking regularly.

Tony Robbins podcast : sounds a little too crazy and feel-y? Does he makes you jump and yell and shout things out in your car? Yep. But His techniques have transformed the 1st world and can transform your head game too.


Absorb what is useful, Discard what is not, Add what is uniquely your own.” — Bruce Lee