Disclaimer: For any of you who look up to me, consider me a roll model or think I’ve got it all together: this post will undoubtedly crash your view of me.
For those of you who are thinking of or are one of my deepest friends; thanks for not judging and for being apart of my crazy, wonderful world!
Recently, my oldest child turned two. I swore I was not going to go over the top with her second birthday and refrain from ordering 50+ invitations in gloss format. It was hard but I did it. I refused to look at pinterest for over a month for fear of getting grande ideas and going over the top.
She is my miracle baby. The one mommy wasn’t sure she wanted and then really wanted and then couldn’t. She is also a girl and I can’t resist the opportunity to do everything up in frills and lace any chance I get! I can see how I can go over board with showering her with a ridiculous amount of non-essentials just because mommy wants to show her, the whole world, and God that she is a treasure!
So instead of a big event we opted for an informal BBQ with some close friends and the grandparents. My daughter still wore the princess crown and the birthday girl shirt and mommy painted her nails but it was “casual” (for me at least). I also wanted to make her cake. A gluten-free beauty with “Happy Birthday” scrolled perfectly over the top in organic sprinkles.
I made the cake and despite it being a bit dry, I figured I could work it. When I was growing up my mother made the coolest cakes. She created Barbie doll dresses, cars, drew planes on top (not stuck a figure of one but actually drew!). I even had a ice-skating cake once where she put me and my daddy figure skating! I assumed, “Happy Birthday” written out shouldn’t be that hard.
I was wrong! It’s really hard!! I did it but it looked like a five-year old who couldn’t spell tried to do it. I scraped off icing and tried three more times only to have my husband come home and declare “Oh honey that’s sweet. Amberly helped.”
While attempting all this I look over to find my almost two-year old shoving dog treats down my five month olds mouth! I flipped out!
“I’m the worst mom ever…I can’t do this.”
“If people find out about this I’ll never have friends”.
“How did I take care of 300+ students/toddlers just three years ago?”
One hour later the lettering on the cake had slid off completely.
What surprised me about this whole endeavor? (besides the dog treats) I was more worried about the fact that people would think I was a culinary catastrophe then the joy of the event.
First of all everyone that was coming were really close friends or family. They already know I’m Koo-koo. They love me to pieces and/or care more about our daughter then to say anything about the interesting cake.
Why then was I so worried? Why can’t we as women drop the “perfectionistic” tendencies in order to love and be loved. People can’t get to know an image very well.
The Pharisees’ in the Bible tried to hold it all together, look the part, and point fingers at others’ flaws. All the while they missed out on relationships. One of them being the most important man in all of history!
Are you missing out on authentic relationship because of judging or fear of being judged?
What are you going to do about it?
For me, I had to call three people immediately and tell them my blunder. Then get over the fact that hey, I can’t ice a cake.
F.Y.I. It tasted great!